Elaine

I had the great fortune to be able to attend one of the online networking events sponsored through the CVAC today and despite the technical glitches and spattered speech patterns, it was simply wonderful to see (and sporadically hear!) my other fellow VAs.

I see their names on posts asking multitudes of complicated questions and they all sound so stunningly professional and capable that quite frankly, at times Im awestruck! While I definitely enjoy belonging to this wonderful group of talented gals (and guys) some days I swear yall are speaking another language or in some sort of highly secretive code that only rocket scientists or persons from another galaxy far, far away can decipher.

Im a wordsmith period. I do not know how to do anything more technical than to reset the bloody clock on my computer and microwave after a power outage. Bits and Bytes are some sort of couch potato snack thats consumed while salivating over the hunks who parade their stuff on Desperate Housewives. I do know how to download files I do it all the time actually and hit run instead of save. This has caused all sorts of fun as invariably at some point Ill have to uninstall the program I downloaded from www.whatsupdoc*.com because its causing my email address to be sent to a colony of pigmys in Bora Bora who are now filling up my inbox with offers to sell me shares in the their lucrative vanilla bean processing companies. (Does the phase Hey mon, dis deal is good! sound familiar to any of you?)

Anyhow, I digress as per usual. The real point (and there is one coming be patient people!) is this How to Survive on Mac & Cheese While Starting Your VA Business. Many more qualified VAs can supply you with all the wonderful and necessary tools to successfully complete the start-up phase of your business. Im here to provide the meat and potatoes of how to survive your first year and stay reasonably sane. So, heres my 2.5 cents worth of advice, including HST, PST, GST, and any other freaking tax that can possibly be levied by our government, on how to maintain your double digit figure (Size 12 is nice!) when starting your VA biz.

1. Clip coupons. Any coupons! Even if youve never dined on baked Spam with a honey-mustard glaze, save that .75 cent coupon. Rip, tear, snip and scissor cut ALL coupons and attach them to your fridge with a motivational magnet that says something like Dont eat a T-bone save a cow! It will make dining on that Spam so much more pleasant. Also, save any/all coupons for more than 1.00 off anything! You never know who you might be able to barter those coupons with to get one you might actually be able to use. Personally, Ive found the Gillette mens shaving cream to be absolutely wonderful, in particular the gel formula. Be a tad wary though as you may have to fight to use it, especially if you have someone from the male species living in your house. This applies to their razors as well. Word of caution: Make sure that your bathroom door locks from the inside before using these 2 products. Much safer this way.

2. Walk. As in walk to the grocery store with your bag of coupons safely stowed in your tote-sized purse. Walking will not only provide you with much needed exercise but it will save on that precious liquid gold called gasoline. When youre in the start-up phase of your business, youre going to want to conserve as much gas as possible (with the exception of that caused by eating the baked Spam), to be able to go see potential clients. Just think of how much money youll save by walking to the store and dragging home 6 grocery bags filled with tomato soup, Spam and good ol mac and cheese dinners! Better yet, walking will help you walk off those mega calories consumed from the aforementioned carbs. After all, youre now a VA and most likely are sitting in your computer chair (oh - get the slightly used ones at your local Salvation Army and use duct tape to fix that broken armrest youre not going to need two anyhow plus wheels arent really that big a deal), so youll likely be starting to see signs of that dreaded condition of BS i.e. Butt Spreading.

3. Get a VA or other Start-up Business Buddy. Go through the list of qualified VAs on CVAC, (or any other business forum you might belong to), and find one whos willing to listen to you whine, complain, cry and lament about anything and everything via email and MSN messenger. Try and find one that possibly has a sense of humor because theyre going to need it when dealing with you. This is a very necessary step as having someone else to commiserate with over the lack of clients beating down your door to avail themselves of your stupendous services, helps keep you reasonably sane. Check to see if they also offer motivational tapes, cds etc. or were formerly on their high school cheer leading squad. Youre going to want one that will keep your spirits high (instead of you having to rely on spirits to get high), and generally offer words of wisdom or not. Be very choosy here. If they keep answering your email messages telling you that theyve now filed a complaint of IM Stalking, I highly suggest you stop talking to them immediately. Perhaps a change of email accounts would be a good move here also.

4. Laugh More Worry Less. This is the biggie folks! If throughout your first year of building your business, you can sit back and have just one gut-clenching, tear-wrenching belly laugh a day, youll make it! If you lose a potential client tough its their loss, not yours. If you gain a client way to go! As the old saying goes, Dont sweat the small stuff and dont pet the sweaty stuff or something like that. Believe in yourself and what you do. You are the best thing since sliced bread (even if youre one sandwich short of a picnic as in my case), and with sheer determination, willpower and blackmail, you WILL get that first client guaranteed! Make sure to ask for testimonials and post them on your website, blog, carve them on a log, and staple brag sheets on the Articles for Sale announcement board at your local supermarket. Hey, they know who you are, right? Youve only been walking there three times a week for 5 months now, lugging that folding shopping cart behind you and fumbling through your coupon clutch at the cashiers wicket, causing everyone behind you to start muttering under their breath about the idiot at the front of the line. Theyll most likely be glad to give you a glowing recommendationif youll just go shop somewhere else.

I do hope that these 4 tips help assist you if youre suffering from the first year VA business blues. If not, oh well, I tried. Please do not email me to be your VA buddy as Ive had to change my ISP, my email account names and MSN Messenger names five times already. Huh. Some people just have NO sense of humor!

Marlene Oulton, president of Write Choice Virtual Assistants, derives great satisfaction from assisting authors, writers, coaches and SOHO entrepreneurs produce clean, crisp and concisely written articles, newsletters, website copy or other literary works. She also excels at ghostwriting and editorial works. She produces a quarterly Newsletter entitled News and Views From My Desk to Yours which contains practical and often humorous articles on issues facing the small business owner. To receive her newsletter, please go to http://www.writechoiceva.com and click on Sign Up button. She can be reached at marlene@writechoiceva.com as well.